Friday, October 14, 2011

Last night...


Last night I lay in bed.
Tossing and turning for hours.
I could not sleep.

I went to bed with Brandon like we always do.
We say goodnight. Kiss.
And sleep overcomes him.
But not me. Not last night.

Last night I lay in bed listening to him breathe.
I know he is asleep.
My mind wanders.
I can't keep track. So many thoughts.
Even now, I still can't remember.

So I prayed.
I prayed for sleep.
I prayed for peace of mind.
For comfort. For rest.

I even prayed for a friend.

...

Nothing. I am still awake.
Lord, please. I beg.

Never have I wanted sleep more than last night.
Tossing. Turning. Uncomfortable.
Still awake.

So I waited.
Waited for answers.
Waited for a solution. Just waited.

I listened to my heart.

Last night I listened.
For the first time in a long time.
I listened.
And waited.

Last night I made a vow.
A vow to always listen.
To my heart. To my Heavenly Father.



Image via

15 comments:

  1. Sorry to hear you had a hard time sleeping.... sometimes when we have lots of things running through our mind it is tough to sleep. Sometimes listening is one of the hardest parts of a conversation. Thanks for sharing this! I pray you sleep well tonight! (:

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  2. i know the feeling alisha!

    I sometimes wake in the middle of the night freaked out about something i'd never even think twice about during the day.

    but sometimes we need those sleepless nights to put it all into perspective. sometimes it forces us to dig into what we don't feel like doing in the day. to process. to pray and to listen.

    amen to your vow (:

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  3. There is beauty in the quietness of just listening to him. I need to do that more often.

    xoxo <3

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  4. I decided blogs need a like button. I love this post. alot. :)

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  5. Your night is what mine is always like. My Hubby can fall asleep in less than a minute. I lay there forever. I will start praying. Sometimes I have so many people that I pray for that I eventually fall asleep. Good luck and I hope you get rest.

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  6. beautiful words and i love that picture.

    Lindsay

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  7. Sorry to hear you had a hard time falling asleep! I usually can fall asleep within minutes, but sometimes it's hard. You write so well, Alisha! I also think it's important to listen to God. :)

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  8. Awwww, this is so honest and beautiful!! I used to have the biggest problem falling asleep...I'm talking I would start bawling crying. Now work wears me out so I'm out in about 1 minute.

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  9. Oh my word I hear ya! I don't know what the answer is though. I know it doesn't help me saying that LOL I'm sure some great suggestions would be more appreciated. knowing you're not the only one doesn't make you less tired either :(

    If I figure out any secret to getting to sleep {and staying asleep} I promise to let you know!

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  10. p.s. your vampire post isnt' working for some reason. i can see it in the blogger dashboard but when you try to click on it it says page not found :(

    I seriously heart Twilight too and have no shame in admitting I'm stoked to go see the new movie next month!!!

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  11. this is so honest and real alisha, thank you for being that with us your blogger friends. i need to be better at listening and waiting and anticipating on hearing God's voice when I ask Him, I need to work on being still. Thank you for the reminder

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  12. My goodness, this was me last night. I was extremely tired at 10. In bed, lights out at 11 and stayed awake with thoughts going a mile a minute until almost 4!! I prayed, I talked I did everything and that darn brain would not stop chattering away.

    And now I feel horrible. haha

    I love your saying you made a vow to listen to your heart. :)

    Emily w/Amazing Grapes

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  13. That is so hard! I have been there. What a great vow to make! Thanks for the encouragement :)

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  14. What a beautiful, beautiful post, Alisha! I really appreciate this post because I feel like we all have nights like that.

    P.S. Definitely going to need your help with BlogPress and html :)

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  15. so powerful Alisha. I too know what's it's like to *try* and fall asleep while your husband is snoozing away. Jordan falls asleep the minute his head hits the pillow where I struggle pretty much every night to fall asleep. I too use it as my time to communicate and converse with our creator! I also find that I come up with great ideas during those not so sleepy moments!

    Thanks for sharing!
    Lindsay

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